The Ringer broke the story last night (though some in sports media have questioned whether they should have) about Sixers GM Bryan Colangelo potentially using burner twitter accounts to alternately take shots at his players and coaches, reveal internal information, defend his own fashion, etc.

So it got us to thinking…who around Purdue sports might be most likely to have a burner twitter? Let’s do some oddsmaking, shall we?
 

Matt Painter, Head Coach, Men’s Basketball (Odds: 50/1). While it’s fun to imagine the highly intelligent and elephantine-memoried Coach Painter manipulating Twitter opinions like chess pieces, I just can’t see it. He doesn’t spend any time on non-basketball items like men’s fashion, dieting, or the silliness that is twitter.

Most likely burner account name: @PaintCan69
 

Jeff Brohm, Head Coach, Football (Odds: 35/1). College football coaches are perhaps the most controlling, desperate to own the narrative bunch out there in sports. It’s perhaps a result of being lauded as deities. Still, Coach Brohm seems like another coach who is so focused on his field activities that he would never make the time to goof off on twitter like the rest of us. 

Most likely burner account name: @AmIBreathing1234

Mike Bobinski, Athletic Director (Odds: 10/1). ADs like to control the narrative, so there’s reason it would make sense. However, Bobinski seems plenty thick-skinned and completely uninterested in what people are saying on the twittermachine. He has his plan and he’s executing on it.

Most likely burner account name: @BobMikeinski
 

Morgan Burke, Former Athletic Director (Odds: 3/1). Burke’s email was always out there and people emailed him frequently – he wrote back regularly when he was contacted and was often pretty direct. He’s generally pretty rah-rah on twitter so he might just need an outlet to yell at the ungratefuls among us.

Most likely burner account name: @therailroadtie
 

Aneesh Ramaswamy, Boiled Sports Audio Engineer (Odds: Even). You know Aneesh has either a secret GOP twitter account that allows him to let his true self out or he’s actually one of the Colangelo burners, paid to stir things up in Philly. Frankly, Aneesh is a slippery one and I don’t think he should be trusted. Oh, sure, he puts out all these lovable tweets on bourbon and chicken and waffles and the like, but we all know better.

Most likely burner account name: @TheBlackHammer
 

Chris Forman, Sports Information (Odds: 1/2). Forman is the SID for Purdue basketball and golf and takes his role very seriously (in a good way). He represents Purdue well on social media and is constantly finding new and creative ways to promote his teams and players. Chris’ one weakness, though, is that he lets jerkheads on twitter get to him sometimes, so could we see him creating off-book feeds to tell said jerkheads what he really thinks?

Most likely burner account name: @ChrisFiveman
 

Travis Miller, Hammer & Rails Fluffer (Odds: 1/4). Travis takes some heat online, much of it deserved. But in the end, he’s just a boy standing in front of the internet asking it to love him.

Most likely burner account name: @DancingWithTheStarsContestant2000
 

Boiled Sports, Godfathers of Purdue Blogging (Odds: no line). We created @HopefulDanny and, before that, a faux Tiller account that eventually made its way to Joe’s family (they didn’t see the humor in it). So you can’t trust us, obviously, and the casino would not be taking bets on this.

Most likely burner account name: @MorganJBurke